Ladies learn how to stop complicating your relationships and lives by comparison

Me and my Husband weeks before our wedding...

And so Jane a bored sit at home wife and mother (who is lazy, idle and loves to gossip), decided to visit Joy her friend just down the street as her children and husband were not at home even without first calling her on phone as courtesy demands. She gets to Joy's doorstep, knocks on the door and is ushered in by Joy who is as idle as she is with so much excitement of having a company at last. Jane is offered entertainment by her hostess and then she begins her fable, boast and 'gist'many (or all)  of which are lies!

"Babe you know we haven't seen each other since my husband came back from jand (i.e a trip overseas or outside the country) last week. Nne eh!, I swear hubby came back with a lot of goodies for me and the kids. It's like he went shopping for us, which is still apart from the shopping trip he promised us to Dubai during ths year's summer holiday. He bought us all sorts of designer clothes you can think of, bags, shoes, makeup for me, underwears and even school stationeries for the kids... That man is just full of everyday surprises for me.

Gullible Joy who has been listening esctatically begins to calculate in her head when last her own husband bought her a simple recharge card and she builds up animosity against the poor unaware fellow waiting to unleash it like a wild dog on him as soon as he comes back later that day while wishing jealously that her loving and doting husband would become more like Jane's husband. She is oblivious of the fact that Jane's husband has a short/bad temper and could be abusive to his wife at times because Jane carefully left that piece of vital information out of her 'gist'. She in her unspoken covetousness even jokingly asks Jane which of the gifts she reserved for her as her close friend and brought for her but your guess is as good as mine, she is disappointed! 

Later that evening, Joy's unsuspecting husband comes home after another hard day and is happy to see his wife. He greets her with a usual hug but is surprised this time that he is met with coldness and a sharp snappish response. He asks what the problem might be out of concern but is rudely ignore with silent mumurings coming from his wife. He retreats to himself, while wondering inside of him what could have led to this sudden change of attitude in his once loving wife.

This is the sad scenario in many marriages and promising courtships as we ladies are fond of giving room to the devil by allowing false fables like this bring about unhealthy and destructive comparisons to our spouses hence spoiling something really good, worth cherishing and worth protecting with comparisons that are very unnecessary. THE SAME GOES FOR THE MALE FOLKS TOO.

We often 'wish' our spouses looks like the guy or girl next door, cooks and clean like your MAMA, drives the same kind of ride like Aunty Susu or Bobo Dele, Well-built or sexy-looking like Mr. A or Mrs B, and so on...

Some of us even take this further by making the stupid mistake of telling this foolish thoughts straight to our spouses face with care for his/her feelings all in a bid to change him/her to fit into our unrealistic expectations. Thus crushing the morale and even maybe the love, devotion and dedication he or she has for us and our marriages. 

We quickly forget that EVERY marriage is bedevilled with its own type of unique challenges depending on the parties involved. We also forget that the grass is never greener on the other side, it only looks so when we fail to water ours; and that marriage as a sacred covenant works/florishes better when both parties keep third parties OUT of their private marital lives and when we each make conscious daily effort to make our marriages work and bring in our very best into our homes. Money, wealth and constant flow of enough cash is good and important in every marriage because bills must be paid and love cannot do that but, it doesn't really, but it  DOES NOT matter who earnswhat or  more and how FAT the family's pocket is if there is mutual love, understanding and maturity between the spouses concerned, and the golden rules to a successful marriage are religiously obeyed and followed mutually. 

BE A BETTER WIFE/HUSBAND/SPOUSE!

Don't nag or coarse your spouse into becoming what you want them to be overnight, change where necessary takes time and love must be the reason for it. Don't kill your spouse's spirit by turning yourself into an unsolicited personality changer as that would only bring about frustration and emotional (or even physical) seperation for the both of you.

Remember that what you may be lusting after, desiring and coveting may not be half as good as what you already have got! The grass is never greener on the other side, you just need to water yours well!