9 core life lessons 98 percent of men learn rather too late in life.

 

Life has a way of teaching everyone lessons, but unfortunately, many men realize some or most of the very important ones a little too late in life.

Whether it’s about relationships, success, or self-growth, these insights often come after years of trial and error—and sometimes after it’s too late to fully benefit from them.

In this article, we’ll uncover 9 key lessons that, according to psychology, 98 percent of men only learn later in life.

By understanding these truths early, you can save yourself from regret and set yourself up for a more fulfilling and meaningful journey.

Let’s dive in.

1) Acknowledging and expressing your own emotions

Speaking from the perspective of a close observer of the male gender, it’s no secret that they often struggle with acknowledging and expressing our emotions. This is a societal norm that’s been embedded in them from a young age.

The mantra “boys don’t cry” has done more harm than good. It’s a psychological fact that suppressing emotions can lead to an array of mental health issues, including depression and anxiety.

According to psychology, many men only learn the importance of being open about their feelings later in life. They realize that expressing emotions isn’t a sign of weakness, but rather a fundamental aspect of mental health and wellbeing.

Reflecting on this, it becomes apparent that acknowledging and expressing feelings are crucial for emotional growth. It’s high time we break the societal norms holding us back and embrace emotional honesty. This is an essential lesson I wish more men would learn sooner rather than later.

2) Life isn’t a competition but a complimentary journey 

I have to admit, for a good portion of my life, I was caught up in the rat race. Climbing corporate ladders, chasing promotions, always wanting to be the best – it felt like life was a never-ending competition.

But one thing that psychology points out, and which I’ve personally experienced, is that this sense of constant competition often leads to burnout and dissatisfaction.

Eventually, I realized that my worth wasn’t defined by how much better I was than someone else. It wasn’t about being ahead or behind. It was about my journey, my growth, and my happiness.

This was a game-changer for me. I started focusing less on competing and more on contributing. I began to value collaboration over competition and found that this brought more fulfilment and joy into my life.

It’s a lesson I wish I’d learned earlier, and it’s something that 98 percent of men realize too late: Life isn’t a competition. We’re all on unique paths, and the only person you should be comparing yourself to is who you were yesterday.

3) The importance of self-care (without becoming selfish)

Contrary to popular belief, self-care isn’t just for women. It’s an integral part of maintaining physical, mental, and emotional health. Yet, many men often push it to the back burner, prioritizing work and other commitments.

Studies reveals a startling trend: men are less likely to seek help for mental health issues or stress management compared to women. This reluctance often stems from societal stereotypes that associate self-care with femininity.

However, the reality is that neglecting self-care can lead to long-term health issues. Studies have shown that chronic stress can result in conditions like heart disease, high blood pressure, and diabetes.

4) The power of living in the present moment

In our fast-paced lives, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of future plans and past regrets. But, according to Buddhism, one of the fundamental truths is the importance of living in the present moment.

This is a concept I delve deeper into in my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego. The teachings of Buddha emphasize that the present moment is all we truly have. By focusing on it, we can achieve mindfulness, which in turn leads to a heightened sense of peace and contentment.

Unfortunately, most men realize this truth too late in life. We spend our youth chasing after future goals or dwelling on past mistakes, forgetting to enjoy and appreciate what’s right in front of us.

The art of mindfulness and staying present isn’t just a philosophical concept but a psychologically proven technique to reduce stress and enhance mental health. It’s a powerful life lesson that can transform our perspective towards life if learned early enough.

5) It’s okay to ask for help in times of need 

Asking for help isn’t always easy. For a long time, I thought I had to do everything myself. I prided myself on my independence and self-reliance. But in truth, this mindset left me feeling overwhelmed and isolated.

The reality is, no man is an island. We all need support, whether it’s emotional, mental, or physical. There’s no shame in admitting you’re struggling and need help. In fact, it takes courage to let down your guard and reveal your vulnerability.

Many men only learn this later in life, often after shouldering burdens alone for far too long. But the sooner we realize that it’s okay to ask for help, the healthier and happier we will be. It’s a sign of strength to acknowledge our limitations and seek assistance when needed.

10 things Wise and Sensible people always keep private.

There’s a significant distinction between being an open book and maintaining a healthy sense of privacy.

The contrast boils down to discretion. Keeping certain things private doesn’t mean being secretive, but rather valuing your own peace of mind and personal space.

According to reliable studies, wise people have a habit of keeping some things to themselves. This isn’t about hiding or being dishonest, but choosing wisely what to reveal and what not to.

This article will unveil the 10 things that smart people always keep private. If you’re keen on cultivating a smart and balanced approach to sharing and privacy, keep on reading!

1) Personal life details

There’s a fine line between sharing and over sharing, especially when it comes to personal life details.

Wise people understand this boundary well. They realize that not every aspect of their personal life needs to be public knowledge.

Even the scriptures supports this approach. Research shows that maintaining a level of privacy around personal matters can contribute to mental well-being and relationship health.

Instead of spilling every detail about their private lives, smart people selectively choose what to share and with whom. This doesn’t mean they are secretive or dishonest, but rather, they value their own privacy and respect others’ as well.

2) Their next move

Let me share a personal example of this point.

Not too long ago, I was preparing for a significant career change. I had been planning it for months, researching, assessing my skill sets, and even secretly taking relevant courses.

But here’s the thing: I didn’t announce it to everyone around me. Even some of my closest friends were unaware until I had taken the leap.

There’s a reason for this. Wise people often keep their future plans to themselves. They understand that sharing every detail of their next move can invite unwanted opinions, unnecessary pressure or even create competitive situations.

Instead, they prefer to work quietly, focusing on their goals and only sharing once they’ve achieved them. It’s not about being secretive; it’s about maintaining focus, reducing distractions, and allowing space for flexibility in their plans.

3) Financial status

Talking about money has always been a bit of a social taboo. However, wise people take it a step further by keeping their financial status private.

Studies have shown that discussing finances can lead to comparisons, competition, and even stress.

Interestingly, a study conducted by Kansas State University found that arguments about money are the top predictor of divorce, beating out conflicts about children, sex, and in-laws.

Keeping your financial status private doesn’t just make you smart; it could potentially save your relationships too. Keep those bank statements and paychecks to yourself – it’s a smarter way to live.

4) Personal core beliefs and indoctrinations:

Personal beliefs, whether they be about religion, politics, or social issues, are often deeply ingrained and can be a source of conflict when confronted with opposing views.

Wise people, aware of this potential for conflict, tend to keep their personal beliefs private. They understand the importance of maintaining respectful boundaries and fostering an environment of acceptance and openness.

This isn’t about hiding who you are or what you believe in. It’s about choosing the appropriate time and place to share these beliefs, and recognizing when it might be more beneficial to listen rather than speak.

After all, in a world full of diverse perspectives, sometimes the smartest thing to do is to simply respect that diversity without feeling the need to challenge it.

5) Family problems

Every family has its share of problems and challenges. Smart people understand that airing these issues publicly isn’t always the best course of action.

Publicizing family issues can lead to unnecessary drama, misunderstandings, or even add fuel to the fire. It can also impact the trust and privacy of other family members involved.

Instead, smart people choose to handle family problems within the family. They seek solutions privately, involving only those who can constructively contribute to resolving the issue.

Maintaining a level of discretion when it comes to family matters is both respectful and wise. It’s not about masking the problem, but about dealing with it in a more contained and effective manner.

6) Past mistakes

We’ve all made mistakes, haven’t we? Some small, some big, and some that we wish we could erase from our memory. It’s an inevitable part of being human.

Wise people understand that while these past mistakes have shaped who they are today, they don’t necessarily need to be shared with the world. They know that everyone has their own journey and struggles.

Instead of dwelling on the past or using it as a conversation topic, smart people learn from their past mistakes and move forward. They focus on evolving and bettering themselves. They choose to define themselves not by their past errors, but by their present actions and future aspirations.

Your past does not define you. It’s okay to keep your past mistakes to yourself and let your actions speak for who you are today. After all, we’re all works in progress, constantly learning and growing.