Self-Care For The "W. O. M. A. N." 101

Sister, please take good care of yourself! 

To all of us warrior women balancing the triathlon of motherhood, careers, and domestic jungles once again I say the Lord is our strength but also remember, you didn’t say “I do” to lose very yourself in the laundry pile or the corporate ladder. The real person who dazzled your partner into commiting to marriage with you is that he loved you for *you*—not just for your potential as a supermom or as a business guru. 

Yes, kids come with all their bundles of joy and truckload of responsibilities, bodies changes happen, exhaustion sets in, and all sorts of workloads could that squash a small elephant. But hey, it is paramount not sacrifice *you* on the altar of the endless to-dos!

It’s understandable to shift priorities, but let’s not vanish ourselves in the process. As much as possible, carve out a sanctuary in time for yourself. Whether it's a steamy bubble bath longer than your toddler's attention span or a morning jog where the only thing you're chasing is your peace of mind, keep that rendezvous with yourself sacred. Else, if you don’t, the person by your side—who promised to be there through thick and thin—might start wondering where the woman he fell in love with has vanished to. 

THE EVERYDAY "W. O. M. A. N."

Dear Woman:

● changes her name

● changes her lifestyle and sometimes identity.

● changes her home.

● leaves her family.

● moves in with you.

● builds a home with you.

● gets pregnant for you, most times more than twice and the pregnancy process changes her body forever.

● she gains weight

● almost gives up in the labour room due to the unbearable pain of childbirth.

● even the children she delivers bear your name...

A Mother's Untold Story

When a woman becomes prégnant, which is a difficult stage of a woman's life yet she had this confidence that after prégnancy she will be free and relieved.

After giving birth, nursing her little baby wasn't an easy job. 

She so much looked forward to getting past that stage as a bréástféeding Mom

The sleepless nights, anxiety, body pain and general stress was much to deal with but she said again "once my baby starts crawling and  moving around I will be free"

Finally, the baby starts walking and moving about

She heaved a a sigh of relief thinking it will be far easier but she was wrong again

Watching and monitoring the kids so they won't swallow pin or even hürt their selves while moving about becomes the job of the day

Toddler stage arrives and the shouting progressed

"Don't touch that

"Don't go there

"Don't put that in your mouth

"Don't climb

"Stop running around before you fall

"I will spank you if you tear that book, drop it back 

And then he tears the book and start giggling happily

You look at him unknowing what to do

You gather up the pieces of the mess and throw away.

They never stop making mess and you never stop cleaning.

You become worried when they're off to school and can't wait for them to be home and once they're home you can't stop shouting and threatening

Even your threats are taken for granted and when you spank them finally you will still beg them to stop crying.

Does any of this parenting stage gets any easier? You keep asking but the answer is not quite.

Interestingly she may have to have to repeat this process or cycle for as many times as she visits the delivery room.

No, it doesn't because even when they are grown and off to the university or even married their safety and good connection becomes another prayer points.

Just do your best and let God take care of the rest.

It doesn't get easier but it does gets better and sweeter ❤❤️❤️ 

A Peep Leak into the Life of an African Mother Like Me 🤱

Today I was privileged to record a short clips of how my kids and I roll everyday they come back home from school. Their dramas and tantrums and everything in between 🤣🤣🤣🤣😂.

HERE ARE SOME KITCHEN TIPS THAT MIGHT HELP YOU.

HERE ARE SOME KITCHEN TIPS THAT MIGHT HELP YOU. 

I guess you never know most of them 🤷

(1) If you don't want your seasoning cubes to get soft and start bringing out water....add garri to the container where you put your seasoning cubes. It will remain strong and fresh. 

(2) Don't throw away your left over pounded yam. Dry it and crush it. After its dried then use it to eat beans....its a great taste.

(3) if your pot of soup sour or changes taste. Put 2-3 pieces of charcoal in it and warm very well....you will recover the delicious taste of it again.

If your shoe is smelly....add piece of charcoal, it will absorb the smell.

Young Intending Couples Must Discuss What Works Best For Them.

Dear young unmarried woman. Please note that there are no norms or common practice or universally accepted way of doing marriage especially in this part of the world.

Whatever traits or beliefs that you've noticed in your intended partner that doesn't sit well with you, make sure you discuss it immediately and trash it out with modalities and agreements between you both as it suits the uniqueness of your relationship.

“I saw my mother be@ting my father” is not a norm!

“I grew up watching my mother kneeling down to serve my father” is not a norm! 

Best Marriage Advice EVER ... ✍🏾

Below are evergreen 'rules of advice' on how to prayerfully work out the marriage of your dreams 👇👇🙏

1. Choose to love each other, even in those moments when you struggle to like each other. Love is a commitment, not a feeling.

2. Always answer the phone when your husband/wife is calling. When possible, try to keep your phone off when you're together with your spouse.

3. Make time together a priority. Budget for a consistent date night. Time is the "currency of relationships," so consistently invest time into your marriage.

4. Surround yourself with friends who will strengthen your marriage. Remove yourself from people who may tempt you to compromise your character.

5. Make laughter the soundtrack of your marriage. Share moments of joy. And even in the hard times, find reasons to laugh.

6. In every argument, remember that there won't be a "winner" and a "loser." You're partners in everything so you'll either win together or lose together. Work together to find a solution.

7. Realize that a strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It's usually a husband and wife taking turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak.

8. Prioritize what happens in the bedroom. It takes more than sex to build a strong marriage, but it's nearly impossible to build a strong marriage without it.

9. Remember that marriage isn't 50/50— divorce is 50/50. Marriage has to be 100/100. It's not splitting everything in half, but both partners giving everything they've got.

10. Give your best to each other, not your leftovers after you've given your best to everyone else.